Globe Trekking Pitstop One: Missoula Montana

Readers who've been breathlessly awaiting the revelation of the first location of my global vacation can now breathe deeply from the fresh air on Montana's Lake McDonald. What a lovely spot! My 85-year-old father stands beside me for a photo, just as we stood together in front of Yosemite's mist-and-rainbow-framed Vernal Falls 50 years ago.

Now, Dad's the short one. However, he will tower as a giant in my heart forever. While mom taught me that life is a beautiful gift from God, he taught me not to stress about dumb stuff. Thus, I was equipped to become a spiritual seeker without the all-too-common religious adornment of a stick up my ass.

My sister and her husband forced me to relax in their plush cozy home for a week - with enough ripe berries, fresh greens, and bison stew to feed the country I live in. Like all cultures, the U.S. has its sins and tackiness, but those who fail to also see its greatness are mostly jealous or deluded by the distorted presentations of the media. America definitely rocks much more than it sucks. Now, I must leave the rich and gorgeous United States with its lame and sleazy Don and Hillary for the next destination to be revealed in my next dispatch. I hope you'll come along.